Of Student Loans (and Squirrels)

It’s been compared to a nightmare, a torture session and a root canal,

says the Newark Star-Ledger's Kelly Heyboer.

And according to Nancy Griesemer of the DC College Admissions Examiner 

Fear of FAFSA is a known, but treatable disease. Often it begins with math phobia or chronic avoidance of anything related to personal finances. 

And what does FAFSA stand for, anyway?  I've never been able to keep it in my head.  Probably because I wasn't paying attention in the first place.

Fearsome and Freaky Squirrel Abuse?  Oh, wait, no, that's my spouse's behavior as I'm trying to write this post.  Turns out he only wants to appreciate nature in the form of songbirds at his bird feeder.  Perfectly natural bushy-tailed rodents, on the other hand, inspire the old coot impersonation which interrupts my thought process every few minutes with window-pounding, slippered yard-charging and inventive swearing.  Yike!


But I digress.  Which is the problem with the whole squirrel saga this spring.  Anyway, FAFSA is really an acronym for Free Application for Federal Student Aid.  Sounds simple enough, yes?  So why do so many of us cower in the face of this new age rite of spring?  I thought it was just me, until I Googled FAFSA, and found legions of articles and posts documenting the fear and trembling that accompanies the obligatory process of filing the odious thing--"the proverbial FAFSA 'wall' ". 


Yesterday, after the combined multi-media nagging efforts of my offspring and the program that has admitted him, I finally completed one of the two FAFSA forms we are required to submit, since he will enter at the end of one academic year and continue into another.  One down and one to go.  I used the new, improved version, courtesy of Obama era changes intended to streamline the ordeal.  I was able to complete the application online, which bypassed my mailing block issues.  For some reason, my duly-applied-for PIN did not allow linking to our completed tax form for 2008--maybe because my husband amended our return, though neither of us remember anymore, or want to go to the trouble of checking.  


The worst part was assembling the necessary, and depressing information about the current net worth of our investments.  Ultimately, most of these were not counted, because they are retirement savings of one kind or another.  What contributed to my procrastination on this task was not math phobia--I love math, and ended up with enough credits for an undeclared minor in the subject, and at one time taught statistics to math-phobic female college students.  No, it was an end-product of previous procrastination, with a large dollop of avoidance of all things financial stemming from plans gone awry in the face of a new, and more impoverished world order.


Had I forced myself to continue opening and examining and filing financial reports, despite their grim messages, I could more easily have put my hands on the needed papers.  Had I done my homework years ago and addressed the question of educational savings products and mechanisms, I would have been better prepared to understand how to categorize the money we had managed to "squirrel" away for this child's continued schooling.  And had I made a bit more progress in becoming a financial grownup, I would be further along in accepting what is, and what it's going to cost.


Another element of my FAFSA avoidance, as I think about it, is fear of numbers, though not of manipulating them mathematically.  I fear the number that will be triggered by applying for aid, the number that represents the amount of additional debt the government will determine we should assume to launch this child in the direction of self-supporting adulthood.  And I fear, too, the risk involved, which in our financial circumstances seems tantamount to a trip to Vegas.  I believe in my kid, but having to put so much money where my mouth is is scary.  


But having analyzed my FAFSA affliction, and bested the monster once again (I filled out and mailed paper FAFSA forms years ago for my eldest, in the even more complicated situation of a divorced parent), I intend to finish the second one today.  One full day before our deadline!  Of course, the online form for this year is different.  And I have to locate the numbers from a different tax file. 


If we're lucky, and this child stays in school, and his sibling joins him in a couple of years, we will be filing FAFSA forms into the foreseeable future.  So I'm going to try to get used to it.  My yearly root canal.  Oh, joy!

Happy Tax Day, Procrastinators of the World!

What's wrong with this picture?  I'm not in it!  Thanks to my Turbo-Taxing second husband, I no longer join the throng of cars snaking past the post office at midnight on April 15th.  Of course, this image is from the Boston Globe's tax day gallery, and it's unlikely I ever would have driven across the country to file my taxes in Boston.  But still, these last-minute desperadoes are my fiscal brothers and sisters.


Don't get me wrong.  I'm no TEA party sympathizer.  I'm relatively okay with paying my taxes.  I'd be a lot happier if my money weren't being spent to maim and kill other citizens of the world.  I would gladly ante up at a higher rate to support more pro-social programs.  And I'd feel better about the whole thing if the IRS didn't expect me to put in all the work up front to figure out how much I owe.  It feels like being visited by a burglar who expects me to show him where all the good stuff is, to pack it neatly and load it into his truck, and give him gas money to drive it away.


And then there's the deadline, the bane of procrastinators everywhere.  The imperviousness with which they blithely delay, knowing there's plenty of time.  Continuing to find better things to do.  Then that cold gripping sensation on or about April 13th, when they finally realize how little time they have left, how much there is still to do.  The desperate searching for misplaced forms, "documentation," fugitive receipts and renegade numbers.  The calls to the IRS "tax help" line, crucial minutes ticking by on hold.  The dash to completion.  The breathless race to the post office.  The long line of revelers, some tired and relieved, some high on the thrill of having made it.  I was one of them.  But no more.  


According to Joseph Cox from Liberty Tax (the folks who brought us the green clad Statues of Liberty waving tirelessly to us wretched refuse from teeming street corners), more people are taking matters into their own hands in this recession year, unable to afford professional tax preparation.  And many of them will not file, either because they just can't get it done, or because they decide not to file because they owe money they can't pay.  Of course, they are leaving themselves open to deeper gouging down the road, what with penalties and all.


Apparently, even Canadians, so much better than we on so many levels, also procrastinate when it comes to paying taxes.  Their deadline is different--April 30--and they write their checks to the "Receiver General."  But H&R Block Canada Inc., in an attempt to admonish Canadians to do their duty--oh, and yes, to drum up business--identifies these "Top Five Reasons for Procrastinating on Your Taxes:"

- You know you owe: 

Just because you will be writing a cheque to the Receiver General on April 30th does not mean you should wait to prepare your return. Getting the documents together and your T1 Form completed early means no pressure when it comes to the deadline. You can even file your return early and then send payment later.

- Outstanding debt means no refund: 

If you fall behind on your student loan payments or child support payments, the debt can be registered with theCanada Revenue Agency. It means that any tax refund or benefits like the GST/HST payment are designated to pay off the loan. Just because you don't get the money doesn't mean you shouldn't file. You have to pay off your student debt eventually.

- Dog ate my slips: 

You moved two times during 2009 so your T4s slips and other information receipts have gone astray or you haven't found them in your new place. Or your employer did not send a T4. You can track down replacement slips or get duplicates from other sources. Under Canada's self assessment system, you are required to provide an accurate estimate of the income you earned in 2009. You need to find your paperwork.

- Don't owe money: 

Your tax refund is money you have already paid in taxes so not filing means you are letting the government keep your money interest free. If you want your money to work for you, it should be invested where it earns some interest at least at a better rate than the CRA offers...which is zero.

- Weather is too nice: 

For many parts of the country, it has been a beautiful spring but the deadline for filing remains April 30. Though taxes and rainy days seem to go well together, you still have to file when the weather is nice.

Kind of lecture-y for my taste.  But solid advice, I suppose.  

I feel a little guilty as I contemplate my fellow North American procrastinators struggling with this onerous annual task.  I have had this cup taken from me.  There but for the grace of the partner I appreciate especially on this day. . .

I plan to celebrate my good fortune today at Starbuck's Make a Difference event.  Bring in your reusable mug and get free coffee!  I'm going to treat my husband.  And without spending a penny of his hard-earned tax return.