Of Warriors, Humble and Otherwise

Sanskrit Name: Baddha Virabhadrasana
English Translation: Bound Warrior Pose
Also Called: Humble Warrior

I've been thinking today about the concept of the warrior in Shambhala Buddhism, and about the various warrior poses, or asanas in yoga.  One reason for this preoccupation, I'm sure, is the physical residue of this morning's yoga class--the muscle memory of not insignificant discomfort. 

In a 2002 article in Shambhala Sun, Cyndi Lee reveals 

one of the best kept secrets of the world--yoga asana practice is not necessarily relaxing. People who come to a retreat looking for a siesta-like yoga experience could be disappointed: folding yourself up like a pretzel may not be a mellow moment--and unfolding is not a piece of cake either.  The relationship between effort and outcome is clear, as opposed to the picture of the beach yogini, arms outstretched peacefully, as if the ends of her fingertips were plugged into a bliss-cloud of happiness. It appears as if she could stay there effortlessly and indefinitely. But the truth is, after only a few deep breaths holding that pose, most people’s arms and legs will begin to quiver involuntarily.

The various Warrior poses are not the highest hurdles in my own ascent.  Half-moon /Ardha Candrāsana and Fierce Pose (also Power or Chair Pose)/Utkatasana) are my personal bête noires--and only because my recently resurrected practice has not yet led me back to more strenuous undertakings.

But it is the Warrior posture, and mentality, that interest me here.  As a pacifist, I have been intrigued to encounter the Warrior within Buddhism, and in yoga--both practices that we generally associate with peacefulness.

Historically, we are told that the Buddha himself was born into the warrior class.  The US military's first Buddhist chaplain, Lieutenant (jg) Jeanette Shin, blogging for Wildmind, tells us that while

[t]he Buddha never advocated the killing or destruction of “infidels” of any religion or doctrine, and always recommended the path of nonviolence. . . .
Shakyamuni’s life and teachings reveal a person raised to be a heroic warrior invested in honor. While he renounced the life planned for him by his parents, as a secular warrior-king, he used the language of warriors to convey the Dharma, so he could stress that following the path of Dharma required similar virtues possessed by warriors.

Thus, we find that

[t]erms like charioteer, sword and shield, war elephants, banners, fortress, archers, arrows, poisoned arrows, are all used in expressing the struggle to overcome one’s delusions.

Pema Chödrön, an American Buddhist nun, has written and taught extensively within the tradition of Shambhala Buddhism, begun by her teacher Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche.  In this tradition, the journey toward awakening is known as the "path of the warrior."  Shambhala teaching speaks of the

bodhisattva-warrior, one who is brave and confident enough to overcome self-centeredness in order to help others.

At the heart of this warrior practice is compassion.


And for the body, as well as the mind, Lee reminds us,

the practice of yoga becomes a training program for being centered, awake, confident and flexible within effortful situations.

Ms. Lee advises the practitioner, in assuming yoga warrior poses, to

try to notice when your body gets tired or your mind gets bored. Stick with it anyway. When it feels difficult, try not to overexert but instead apply “right action”--action composed of rhythm, movement, direction, energy and intention, but never aggression. This attitude is in line with the warrior's code, and engenders courage to face reality and relate to it appropriately, using the weapons of gentleness and awareness. 

In musing about this today, I am encouraged to think of myself building strength and equanimity, both mental and physical, in my practices of yoga and meditation.  I am certainly in need of both as I weave in and out among the obstacles placed in my path, as in all of ours, in the present day.

I aspire at least to introduce my inner chicken to the warrior I can become.  And to keep on training.

Done for the Week: More Time on the Hamster Wheel

Another week.  Another few dollars.  And continuing fatigue and overcommitment.  It must be midwinter.

Here's what I slogged my way through last week. 

Done for the Week:  Feb. 7-13

1. Continued off-season race training, still fighting a sinus infection and an intestinal bug; biked once
2. Finished Buddha's Brain:  The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom, by Rick Hanson
3. Stepped up volunteer support to transitioning nonprofit, due to death in colleague's family
4. Worked my two part-time jobs
5. Published 5 blog posts
6. Wrote 3 Gratitude Journal entries
7. Meditated 3 times
8. Attended candidates' forum on county's jobs emergency
9. Watched our 2 teams play 2 basketball games
10. Attended Issues Night
11. Attended showing of 9500 Liberty and panel discussion on anti-immigrant legislation
12. Attended two yoga classes
13. Learned some new html tricks
14. Babysat for my grandson; watched Babe (the Pig)
15. Spent two scheduled sessions on "novelling"
16. Took my dog to the dog park with my son and husband
17. Had Happy Hour soup date with my husband
18. Sent medical information to my sister, to help with my mom's care

Last week's focus goal was to "ease into the coming week, and to resist getting drawn into the vortex of other people's agendas."  This goal fell victim to the unexpected death of my colleague's brother, which led me to take up some significant slack in our organization's ongoing overload of work and crises.  What can I say?  If there is some other way to handle this kind of thing, I don't know what it is.  The best I can aim for, I suppose, is to trim my list of "subject to's," so that there are fewer goads to abandonment of my "best laid plans."  I will keep the same focus goal for the coming week, and try to breath before volunteering, or assenting to requests.

As I continue to try to endure, and not magnify, the stress of my life at this stage, I am helped by others' suggestions and outlooks.  This past week, I followed the recommendation of my yoga teacher, and read Rick Hanson's Buddha's Brain:  The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom, item 2, in red, on the list above.  My rapid response assessment this morning--as I prepare to rush out the door to a family birthday breakfast, followed by a protest rally, office time and an afternoon of child care, a birthday dinner and movie, and a few other things I'm going to try to cram in--is that reading this book was the most important thing I did last week.  I will write more about it later, but obviously its subject pertains to my never-ending battle for . . .

And now, I'm off to try to put into practice some of what I learned.

Getting Around to Me

There's a whole self-care industry out there, competing for our attention with all the other fads and crazes.  But I'm starting to learn that maybe, just maybe, there's a reason for the pendulum to swing in this direction, in this time in our communal history.  Maybe, just maybe, this whole thing goes a little deeper than hula hoops and pet rocks.  Deeper, even, than body art!


The common analogy that we hear is that of a passenger on an airplane, who is instructed, in the event of an emergency, to put on her own oxygen mask before helping others traveling with her--even her children!


I am coming to the recognition that my plane has been stalling out for years, and that I'm still gasping for air.  I've been rushing around affixing so many masks to the faces of so many others for so long that my breathless and exhausted "emergency" state feels normal.  And what's more, if we listen to the common cultural refrains, this kind of stress is "a woman thing."


Suddenly, my body and my mind are telling me that this is not something I can get away with putting off any longer.  It is time I take what I've heard and read out of my head and into my life.  Though I can spout a good self-care line with the best of them, I seem to have some kind of relaxation disability that has thus far not been accommodated.  And I can't look to others to help me deal with this.  There is no I.E.P. (Individual Education Plan) for us stressaholics.  Though a 12-step program might be a good idea. Or here's an idea--relaxation boot camp!


Anyway, for today I am making two self-care commitments.  First, I am going to make every effort to stop "talking trash" to and about myself.  And secondly, I am going to try to stop approaching every task, as my mother says, "like I'm killing snakes."  With all the yoga and meditation I am squeezing into my life, and all the exercise I am doing, these two problem behaviors appear to be part of why I am still so stressed.  Basically, the watchword is self-acceptance, or what Buddhist teacher Pema calls maitri.

Maitri is translated in a lot of ways, maybe most commonly as love, but the way Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche [Chödrön's teacher] translated it was unconditional friendliness and in particular unconditional friendliness to oneself. 

 Doesn't seem like so much to ask.

A Basic Middle Way To Do List for Difficult Days

The last week or so has been kind of a tough time.  And I'm anticipating a bit more of the same.  When things get harder, I am tempted to veer to one of two extremes.  Either I load up my to-do list and try to power my way through.  Or I take to the couch.  (Not my bed, of course.  That would be just too depressing!)


Seems like a good time to reflect on the Middle Way.  

And what, monks, is the Middle Way realized by the Thus-Come-One, which gives vision and understanding, which leads to calm, penetration, enlightenment, to Nirvana?

It is just this Noble Eightfold Path, namely: Right View, Right Intention, Right Speech, Right Action, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, and Right Concentration. – The Buddha, Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta

Gary of Buddha Space, writing on the Middle Way for--oddly enough--The Middle Way, tells us that

According to the Buddha, the Middle Way is a life lived between the extremes of self-denial and self-indulgence. Neither hedonist nor ascetic are to be imitated, for the Noble Eightfold Path weaves its way through life avoiding both these unenlightened lifestyles. 

This Noble Eightfold Path, set out for his monks by Siddhartha Gautama more than 2500 years ago, is deceptively simple.  Inherent to its meaning are the precepts of balance, acceptance and mindfulness.  


Since I am not the Buddha, nor do I play one on TV, I struggle to wrap my 21st-century cluttered mind around his wisdom.  But the guidance I receive this morning, whether the intended understanding or not, is that I need to keep going, but to do so gently, and without judgement, at this time.


And so here is my pared-down to do list, for difficult times:


1.  Keep breathing
2.  Fulfill necessary obligations (work, family responsibilities) to the extent possible
3.  Meditate
4.  Get some exercise
5.  Sleep
6.  Clean something
7.  Read something
8.  Write something
9.  Be kind to someone
10.  Eat something healthful and good-tasting


For today, that is enough.  

A Path Obscured

One of my favorite Pema Chödrön books is Comfortable with Uncertainty.  Because I'm not.


Wikipedia, that great lowest common denominator resource, tells us this about Pema Chödrön. 

Pema Chödrön (formerly known as Deirdre Blomfield-Brown) is an American woman who was ordained as a Buddhist nun in the Chinese lineage of Buddhism in 1981 . . . and a teacher in the lineage of Chögyam Trungpa. The goal of her work is . . .  to apply Buddhist teachings in everyday life.

A prolific author, she has conducted workshops, seminars, and meditation retreats in Europe, Australia, and throughout North America. She is resident teacher of Gampo Abbey, a monastery in rural Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, Canada.

My meditation group, in Buddhist circles a sangha, was introduced to her writings by the minister who got us started and has since retired.  Part of our weekly meetings is devoted to group reading from a selected text, and we have spent a lot of time with Pema Chödrön, and with uncertainty.  But I guess I'm a slow study.


At present, my overly anxious mind is tantruming about a number of things whose outcomes I can't foresee.  I want to know, and know now, whether my blood pressure is going to come down; whether the SSRI discontinuation syndrome, triggered by my doctor's decision to switch me to another antidepressant, which required discontinuing the first medication, is going to be alleviated soon; whether I will be able to quell the panic I am beginning to feel about the possibility of panicking at the triathlon; and oh so many other things related to my overall stress level right now.  Of course, stressing about stress, and about uncertainty, are not helping any of this.  


But since I can't see around the corners just now, or very far ahead on the mist-shrouded path, I have decided to take the advice I gave a friend lately, a strategy that has worked for me in the past.  I am going to try to proceed from working decisions in moving forward.  For now, one working decision is to continue preparing for the triathlon.  Another is to do what I can not to invest in panic, and to be gentle with myself in accepting that this is one of my challenges right now.  I will act as if things will turn out okay, and as if I know what I'm doing.  I will just keep putting one foot in front of the other, as Therese Borchard (Beyond Blue) tells us to do.  I will keep training, keep practicing compassion for myself and others, and keep going.  Without attachment to certain destinations and results.


I will keep in front of me these words of 13th century Sufi poet Rumi:

Guest House

This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

What Others Think Buddha Would Do (or Have Us Do) About Procrastination

As promised in yesterday's post, on What Would Buddha Do About Procrastination?, today's post shares some of what I learned poking around on the internet in pursuit of greater understanding of where Buddhists stand on procrastination.  Problem or not?  If a problem, what to do about it?  


I have only scratched the surface at this point, given the 2,010,000 results turned up by my Google search, but my first impressions are that it is an old consideration in this ancient tradition; that as with most subjects taken up by this archaic and multi-form system of thought, positions, including the outright contradictory, abound; and that the question, if not necessarily the problematizing, is "appropriately" Buddhist.  (Whew!)


Five Nuggets Culled from my Web Search for Buddhism and Procrastination:


1.  A very cool cartoon, on Cartoonstock's website, showing a smiling old man on a mountain top, perusing what appears to be a pamphlet entitled "Zen and the Art of Procrastination." 


2.  HuggieSunrise's article on "How to Stop Procrastinating with the Help of Meditation," on Helium's website.


3.  From The Golden Rules of Buddhism - part II, compiled (but not uploaded) in the late nineteenth century by H.S. Olcott: 

Procrastination is[moral] defilement, continued procrastination is defilement. By non procrastination [punctuality] and knowledge, root out your darts [of sin]. 

(Utthana Sutta, v. 4) [This source is believed to be one of the oldest in the written Buddhist cannon.]

4.  An article entitled "Mindful Living, the Procrastination Ninja Way," at Elephant, in which Ricardo das Neves puts a Buddhist spin on the idea I first encountered as John Perry's "structured procrastination," complete with instructions for maintaining an alternative to do list.

5.  And this from Karma Triyana Dharmachakra, the North American seat of His Holiness the Gyalwa Karmapa, head of the Karma Kagyu school of Tibetan Buddhism. 

The fourth obstruction is the habit of laziness. Because of this negative pattern we put off doing our practice until the next day or the day after that or maybe next month or next year, and so on. We just keep procrastinating, and end up not getting anything accomplished. In this way, laziness can have a very undermining effect on our practice, and discipline as well as mindfulness is needed to combat it.

So in this lineage at least, procrastinating about meditation is clearly a problem.


For the time being, I am going to put off (but not procrastinate) further inquiry in this area, so that I can proceed on today's to-do list, alternative and otherwise.  Namaste.

What Would Buddha Do About Procrastination?

Sitting last evening with the other stalwart member of my taking-the-summer-off sangha, I found myself thinking about whether or not it makes sense, from a Buddhist point of view, to concern myself with procrastination.  Of course, the thing to do while attempting to meditate is to notice where my mind has gone off to and then to gently bring it back to my breath.  Which I did.  Before it wandered off in a new direction.


But I was left with an interest in thinking more about my question.  And what I came up with first is that I have only the foggiest understanding of what Buddhism "says" about anything.  I don't really call myself a Buddhist.  Rather I am a student of Buddhism.  Which should let me off the hook for sometime to come, as far as "getting it" goes.  


I have progressed only slightly beyond the common misperception of the practice, so intriguingly presented in Mark Salzman's novel The Soloist--not to be confused with Steve Lopez's novel of the same name, which ultimately became a "major motion picture"--that "anything goes," or "It's all good."


In Salzman's story, a comparative religion teacher at a community college is called to testify in the trial of a Zen student who killed his master during a meditation retreat.  

The gist of his testimony was that Zen is an iconoclastic sect of Buddhism that encourages impulsive, spontaneous behavior. . . . a nihilistic philosophy which teaches that everything is an illusion, and that all value judgements like good or bad, right or wrong, are meaningless.  [p. 174]

But if this community college instructor's view is a distortion, what of this from last night's reading?

. . . [E]verything is transitory, including ourselves.  But the self, or ego, would like us to believe that everything is permanent.  If we actually admitted that everything is transitory, we would have no solid ground for attachment--and ego is based on attachment.  Grasping to a nonexistent self, we misread our world and lose the true treasure of our mind. [from It's Up to You:  The Practice of Self-Reflection on the Buddhist Path, by Dzigar Kongtrül; p. 19]

 And attachment, of course, is to be avoided because of its relationship to suffering.  But is it attachment to desire to get something done?  To care about whether something gets done or not?  Apparently not, though I don't yet understand why. 


This morning, I began to poke around the internet to see how Buddhists think about procrastination.  (One reason I love blogging--it legitimizes my urge to surf.)  In tomorrow's post, I will share some of what I found.


In the meantime, I'll try to remain in a state of nonjudgemental awareness about the whole thing.